As we age, things change, priorities change, and bodies change. Yet, despite differences in how you may look or feel, it’s still easy to get stuck in a rut, and to lose some of the passion and intimacy you once shared with your partner.
The good news is that changes can be opportunities to improve, and routines can turn into invitations to mix things up.
There is still plenty of good sex – and even great sex – to be had.
Here, we’ll explore how you can continue to express yourself intimately, strengthen your relationship, and feel great about where you are physically and sexually. You’ll learn how to have better sex – no matter your age or stage of your relationship.
Changing Lives, Changing Bodies
First, it’s important to be real. Sex in a long-term relationship – or sex after you’ve just gotten out of a long-term relationship – can be challenging. You may find the desire is there, but you’re not quite a teenager anymore. You’re older now with additional pressures of career, money, and family. You also may be going through physical changes as you age that can affect energy, strength, muscle and fat mass, bone density, and sexual function.
Acknowledging these things does not diminish your potential, though. It just sets a realistic baseline from which to launch new solutions.
What You Can Do
To offset the changes you may be experiencing, there are proactive things you can do starting right away to look and feel your best.
Live a healthy lifestyle.
This means eating right and exercising.
Avoiding fatty, fried and processed foods can reduce your risk of clogging arteries and blocking blood flow throughout the body. A traditional Mediterranean diet, including fruits, vegetables, and healthy fats like nuts and fish, is often recommended.
Regular aerobic activity, such as running, swimming, or walking, is also important.
If you smoke, take steps to stop. And if you drink, make sure to limit yourself to no more than two or three glasses a day.
Add these foods.
While the medical world remains divided on whether or not any aphrodisiacs actually work, there is research to suggest there are a handful of foods with health benefits tied directly to sexual performance:
Oysters. Oysters have long been touted as an aphrodisiac due to their high zinc content.
Pomegranates. This fruit has grown in popularity for its high antioxidant content, which is beneficial for anyone.
Chili Peppers. If you can stomach spicy foods, chili peppers can have many health benefits, some of which are tied to sexual arousal and performance.
Chocolate. Dark chocolate boosts levels of dopamine in the body, which is a feel-good neurotransmitter that causes a feeling of pleasure in the brain, elevated heart rate, and heightened motivation.
Avocados. Their high levels of folic acid, vitamin B6, fatty acids and potassium are all linked to sexual performance.
Bananas. Bananas contain the bromeliad enzyme, which has been linked to increased male libido.
Olives. The monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats in olives (and olive oil) have been known to boost heart health and improve circulation in addition to boosting hormone production.
Pass on these.
After you add the good stuff, you can further improve your sexual health by cutting out the bad stuff:
Meat. Experts advise to reduce your intake of meat and opt for alternatives like plant sources of protein, nuts, and fatty fish.
Fried foods. French fries, fried meats
anddoughnuts can hinder circulation and promote obesity, which can lead to heart disease, cancer, problems with cholesterol, and problems with sexual health.
Soy. Soy can have an “estrogenic” effect, which can throw off your balance of estrogen and testosterone and affect your sexual health, mood, energy, and strength. Avoid soy found in processed foods and energy bars.
Microwave popcorn. Sources say this treat is not bad because of the food, but because of the lining of the bag. It’s made with perfluorooctanoic acid, which has been linked with cancer and with lower testosterone levels.
Get intimate in other ways.
An important thing to remember is that sex doesn’t have to mean intercourse.
Sex is also about intimacy, trust, and communication – coming together in a way that only you and your partner know. Focus on rethinking sex by thinking of intimacy in other ways – plan a second honeymoon, try a make-out session, or revive date night.
You’ll find what you do outside of the bedroom lays the groundwork for better sex later on.
All Natural Ways to Achieve the Best Erections of Your LifeLearn More
Try a Penis Pump
Another answer to how to have better sex is with the use of vacuum therapy or a penis pump.
A penis pump for ED uses the principles of physics to create an erection naturally. The penile tube is placed over the penis, and a vacuum suction is used to gently pull blood into the penis, creating a solid erection that is suitable for intercourse.
Once an erection is achieved, a soft support ring is placed around the base of the penis to hold the erection in place. (See how it works!)
Penis pumps are proven effective in over 90% of clinical trials, and they have helped thousands of men continue to perform with satisfaction.
Learn more about how to have better sex with a penis pump for ED.
Simply put, a medical penis pump allows you to have an erection suitable for sex. The pump, or vacuum therapy device, is a medical-grade tool that mimics the process the body goes through when it becomes aroused.
In using the device, an acrylic cylinder attached to a vacuum pump is placed over the top of the penis. Air is then pumped out of the cylinder creating a vacuum suction. This draws blood into the shaft of the penis and causes it to swell and become erect.
Once the penis is erect, a support ring is placed onto the base of the penis, holding the erection in place. At the time, the band can be left on safely for up to 30 minutes.
Here's Why Men Love Penis Pumps
A medical penis pump can restore your sex life. And there are many more reasons penis pumps are growing in popularity.
They are 100% natural.
They don’t require ingesting medication or undergoing surgery. You’re not dealing with drugs that could impede your overall health or bring unwanted side effects. This is an external device that simply uses the laws of physics.
They increase spontaneity.
A penis pump makes it possible to have sex immediately – when the mood strikes. You don’t have to worry about taking a pill and waiting for it to take effect.
The penis pump is small, discrete, and easy to bring along. This means sex can happen where you want it to, and you don’t have to stress about whether you’re in the right setting to achieve an erection.
They increase confidence.
This ability to have an erection whenever you’re ready can make you feel young again, viable and masculine. This can be very powerful in helping you return to a regular and satisfying sex life.
It can also increase confidence outside the bedroom, making you more attractive and desirable to your partner.
They boost intimacy.
Finally, a medical penis pump can help restore your sex life because it is not something that is introduced without an honest conversation.
Using the device will be new to both of you, so it’s important to talk about it, understand expectations, and be open. Incorporating the pump into your love-making is an intimate experience that can bring the two of you closer.
Your partner can also be involved in operating the pump, which can add to the excitement for both of you.
They foster communication.
Incorporating vacuum-assisted therapy into the bedroom is not something one
Using one requires communication about what it does and what you hope to achieve. It can seem clinical or sterile, so it’s important to open up to your partner and be honest about the use of the device. Introduced with confidence, penis pumps can bring more intimacy to your relationship.
Learn more about how to use a penis pump with your partner.
They invite experimentation.
Some non-medical-grade pumps are actually sold as adult enhancement products or “toys.”
They create an opportunity to experiment with sensations and firmness, and they come with manual or battery-operated pumps and often support rings of various textures and sizes. As such, they can make your time with your partner more erotic and playful, bringing back the spark to your typical routine.
They can make sex more frequent.
With a penis pump, you can see how easily – and often – erections can be achieved. It gives you more control of your body and lets you get into the habit of having sex. This improves your overall health and boosts your confidence, which in turn increases your sex drive.
It becomes cyclical: Having more sex leads to wanting more sex, which leads to having more sex.
They can be used when you want.
A penis pump does not impose any timing issues.
Results happen immediately – there is no need to look for your medication or wait for a pill to kick in. Also, there are no side effects. And, it can be used regardless of if you have certain medical conditions, or are taking nitrate medications for heart disease or alpha-blockers for prostate problems.
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More Ways to Make Sex Even Better
Beyond using a penis pump, there are still more things you can do to have great sex.
Try a new position.
Having your partner get on top allows you to send less blood to major muscle groups and more blood to your penis, making it easier to achieve an erection.
Another position to try is one that allows for manual stimulation of the penis. By adding mild pressure to the base of the penis, you can constrict the outflow veins and allow more blood to stay in place. Learn more about positions here!
Open your doors and your mind. Explore the opportunities of golf courses at midnight, hiking trails, and secluded parks. They can all be spontaneous and romantic settings.
Of course, it’s important to assess the risk first. A fear of being “caught” can add to the thrill, but you really don’t want to be discovered.
If you want to stay indoors to heat things up, try the kitchen. The kitchen has chairs, tables, and countertops, which sources say are ideal for the “butterfly” or modified missionary position.
This position takes advantage of the height of the countertop for greater penetration. Your partner sits on the edge of the counter facing you, while you remain standing in front of her.
Take a tour.
Of your home! Christen the living room, the dining room, the hallways, and the stairs. This is a great way to not only mix up the routine but also celebrate an empty nest.
Bring the topic up to your partner as well. You may find that just thinking about the places you could have sex can get you both aroused.
Plan a trip.
Another thing you can do to spice up your sex life is to get away from it all. Being at home can bring on pressures of work, maintenance, bills, and life’s demands – all things that can create stress and drain your libido.
Planning a weekend getaway, tropical vacations, or even a second honeymoon can do magic in recharging your sex life and adding fun and adventure to your relationship.
Think outside the box.
Did you read about a clandestine location in a novel? See something on TV? Perhaps it seemed far-fetched and unrealistic to do in real life. But, is it really?
Dig deep into your wildest fantasies and see what you can actually make happen.
Think locations on your partner.
Finally, if you’re looking for ways to spice up your sex life, consider that the location may not be a destination. It could be a place on your partner. An erogenous zone you never knew about? An elusive spot you’ve never touched?
Reinvigorating things may just be a matter of slowing down and rediscovering what your partner likes.
Indeed there are plenty of ways to have great sex – at any age. And some of the best sex of your life can still be ahead of you. These tips – from lifestyle changes to penis pumps to adding spice to your love life – can all go far in helping you go the distance for as long you’d like.
To learn more about how to improve your sex life, download our free ebook All-Natural Ways to Achieve and Keep the Best Erections of Your Life.