Sex is a key part of any relationship and a means of creating intimacy and maintaining your connection. Because it’s so important, when you’re in a dry spell or stuck in a routine, it can reduce the quality of your time together and thus impact how you and your partner feel about each other. To get yourself back on track, these three strategies to spice up your sex life can help.
Embrace your body.
It’s common as we get older to get more sedentary and gain some weight, which can have negative effects on self-confidence and self-image, and thus the willingness to prioritize sex. If this is the case for you, experts advise to relax and change your focus. Sex is good for your health and your mood, and a few extra pounds really don’t matter.
To enhance how you feel—and spice up your sex life—the first thing to do is to stop obsessing about things you don’t like and focus on the body parts that you do. Then, accept yourself as you are. Change is still okay, but it’s important not to focus only on what’s negative and what’s not working—focus instead on the things that are! Along those lines, accept the fact that you’re perfect now. If you lose weight or build muscle, you will feel better, but not “more perfect.” Feel perfect as you are and go forward with confidence!
Return to foreplay.
Another strategy is to revisit foreplay. As we get older and more efficient with our time, it’s tempting to forget this stage. But to spice up your sex life, it can be very effective to slow down and revisit what you probably used to do every time at the beginning of the relationship.
Like with any physical activity, sex requires a process to get your body and your mind in the game. Experts advise to aim for at least 10 minutes of foreplay “to give your bodies enough time to warm up.” If 10 minutes feels like a long time, these same experts recommend:
- Purchasing and playing a sex game that presents rules for what to say and do to each other.
- Talking dirty by telling your partner what you’re feeling or thinking or what you want your partner to do.
- Getting close by exploring different ways to touch each other such as dancing or showering together.
- Experimenting with oils and flavored products for massage or for incorporating tasting and licking to your routine.
Try something new.
Finally, the trick to how to spice up your sex life can be as simple as trying something new. This can be a new position, a new time of day, or even a new location. Try a different room of your house, or schedule a weekend getaway. Sometimes just a change of scenery can make a tremendous difference in your ability to let go and reconnect.
Another new thing to try is an adult game, vibrator, or toy. Penis pumps are indeed an effective solution to erectile dysfunction. But they can also be used to add new sensations to your arousal and new adventures in the bedroom. And they can be a tactic for how to have better sex no matter your age.
It’s natural to lose passion and excitement over time, and wanting to spice up your sex life is a common desire for couples everywhere. These tips can help—they are simple, fun, and most importantly, natural and easily doable without doctors’ appointments or prescriptions. To learn more about natural ways to improve sex and to achieve and keep the best erections of your life, download our free ebook.